It was nice.
I say that not to be cruel, but to be honest. Three months ago we were naively living as if we were just a ho-hum normal family with a regular ol' life. No big surprises, just usual concerns of trying to sell a house (still...), trying to figure out how to raise a three year old, how to get our four month old to gain weight, nothing major. The fact that our family and its dynamic is forever changed is still something that is sinking in for all of us I think.
In the last week we've had three appointment for Sam and after this last one, on Tuesday, I lost it. I was (am?) overwhelmed. I hadn't given a great deal of thought to Sam's condition in so long, and it was hard to hear two days in a row how he's behind...how we have to work with him to get him stronger and help him catch up. Please don't misunderstand, I am ecstatic to finally be starting physical therapy. To have multiple people evaluate him, help us know the right ways to work with him...it is fantastic! It is also very hard. I'm glad I have these therapists to hold up a mirror and say to me, your son isn't just the average kid. It's time to fully face this, embrace it, and move on.
So here I am. Facing the fact that my son has some work to do. He has some catching up to do physically. He has another surgery in a year or so. He'll have more work to do after that. He may even have more surgeries down the road. This is my alternate reality. My daughter has to adjust to Sam getting therapy 2x/week and getting this special attention and we, as parents, have to figure out how to balance that out for her. This is our family right now. Time for me to figure this out! More to come, I'm sure.